Shyness is a common trait among children, and it can be expressed in different ways. Some children may withdraw from social interactions, while others may be hesitant to speak in front of others. A new study conducted by Brock University researcher Kirsten Wentzel explored the two faces of shyness in children. According to the study, shyness can be rooted in temperament or experienced as an emotion.
Temperament-based Shyness
Temperament-based shyness is innate and present from birth. It is influenced by genetics and tends to be stable over time. Children who are temperamentally shy are often cautious in unfamiliar situations and take longer to warm up to new people. They may also be more sensitive to stimuli and easily overwhelmed by loud noises or bright lights.
According to Wentzel, temperament-based shyness is a protective mechanism that helps children avoid potentially harmful situations. It allows them to assess risks and benefits before engaging in social interactions. However, when this type of shyness becomes excessive, it can interfere with a child’s social development.
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Emotion-based Shyness
Emotion-based shyness, on the other hand, is a reaction to specific social situations. It is not rooted in temperament but rather emerges in response to environmental factors such as parental attitudes or peer interactions. Children who experience emotion-based shyness may feel anxious or embarrassed in social situations and may avoid them altogether.
Wentzel notes that emotion-based shyness can be a result of learned behavior. For example, if a child is constantly told to be quiet or is not encouraged to socialize with others, they may become shy as a coping mechanism.
Embracing Shy Children
Parents may find it challenging to know how to support their shy child. While it may be tempting to push them out of their comfort zone, this can lead to further anxiety and stress. Wentzel suggests that parents should instead focus on creating a safe and supportive environment that allows their child to develop at their own pace.
Some tips for embracing a shy child include:
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Encourage them to participate in social activities but don’t force them to do so.
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Avoid labeling them as shy and instead emphasize their strengths.
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Teach them coping strategies for dealing with social anxiety, such as deep breathing or positive self-talk.
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Model positive social behaviors and encourage them to practice these behaviors in a safe setting.
So, shyness is a complex trait that can be rooted in temperament or experienced as an emotion. Parents can support their shy child by creating a safe and supportive environment that allows them to develop at their own pace. With patience and understanding, shy children can thrive and grow into confident adults.
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